What’s the most unhinged piece of wedding advice you’ve received?

There’s nothing like a wedding to bring everyone together. As soon as the engagement announcement has been made and the invitations go out, it can seem like everyone wants to be involved. It’s all well and good… except when “being involved” means people offering their wildest unsolicited advice.

Whether it’s your mum’s expectation of more guest-list input than you’d like or a well-intentioned friend who appoints themselves as an unofficial wedding planner, it can be tricky to set firm boundaries in place. We asked our nearlywed and newlywed couples about the advice they received — specifically the completely unhinged, “They said WHAT?” bits of gold.

“Don’t bother with your opinions; the wedding’s all about the bride.”

Kicking off with a classic! Many of our couples mentioned hearing this advice: that one person should handle all the wedding planning while the other just shows up. While this might work for some, we love seeing both partners involved, each contributing in their own unique way to the planning journey.

Better advice?

“Play to your strengths.” Maybe your partner is a spreadsheet wiz, while you’re more into the pretty aesthetics of the wedding. Or perhaps you couldn’t care less about the playlist… but have some solid input to contribute for the menu. Wedding planning is best when it’s a shared joy.

“Don’t worry about the budget; gifts will cover it!”

While a pile of beautifully wrapped gifts or a hefty honeymoon fund contribution is a nice sweetener at the end of your celebration, you shouldn’t be relying on the generosity of your guests to cover your budget. At Easy Weddings, we firmly believe in the power of a well-complied wedding budget.

Better advice?

“Start your budget early!” Gifts are a lovely surprise, but you’ll enjoy your wedding more knowing that you’ve planned within your means. Having a budget doesn’t mean sacrificing all of your top wedding must-haves. It’s more about setting realistic priorities and planning accordingly.

“You have to wear a veil, or no one will know you’re the bride.”

No veil? No worries! While some wedding traditionalists might believe that no one will know who the bride without a veil, we strongly disagree. Your presence, style, and happiness will make it clear who the star of the day is, veil or no veil.

Better advice?

“It’s your wedding — do it your way!” You should wear whatever makes you feel most comfortable and confident on your wedding day. So, if that’s a flowing cathedral-length veil, great. But if a sculptural headband, flower crown, or freshly blown-out mane is more your style, that’s perfect also!

“Diet for your wedding—you don’t want to not fit into your dress!”

Yikes! Talk about overstepping the line. It’s never appropriate to give unsolicited advice about someone else’s body. This is the kind of negativity you don’t want to invite into your life before a happy occasion like your wedding. A simple “No, thanks! Please don’t bring this up again.” should be enough to set a boundary with most people.

Better advice?

“Make sure you’re fuelling your body adequately.” Wedding planning can be exhausting, so it’s important to take in enough nutrients to power through. On your wedding day, you’ll likely be up early preparing, and (hopefully) you’ll be dancing the night away until the early hours. Make sure you’re eating and hydrating your body accordingly.

“You two shouldn’t sleep in the same room the night before!”

This one is purely a personal preference. In many modern relationships, couples live together for years before tying the knot. Therefore it can seem false or unnatural to spend the night before the celebration apart. That said, perhaps you want to build the anticipation for your first look or spend the night before with your respective wedding parties. Whether you opt to spend the evening apart or together, it’s nobody’s business but yours.

Better advice

“Try to get a good night of sleep before the celebration.” All of the wedding anticipation and nerves can keep even the most sound-sleeping couples awake on the nights before their wedding day. Whether it’s together or alone, try to have a relaxing night with lots of rest before your wedding day. You don’t want to be yawning through the ceremony or speeches!

“Don’t waste time thanking guests at each table—they don’t care.”

You’re the guests of honour at your wedding! Trust us: everyone is going to want some one-on-one time with you. While the catering, open bar, and DJ might be perks of a wedding celebration, let’s not confuse why everyone has rocked up. Many people will have travelled to attend your day and celebrate with you — enjoy their company!

Better advice?

“Try to carve out some time for the two of you in the evening.” It doesn’t have to be long, but taking a moment to breathe and catch up with your partner is a great idea. Then, you can head back to the party to celebrate with your loved ones some more.

“Better have a formal sit-down meal because people expect luxury!”

Don’t get us wrong, we love a four-course gourmet meal with silver service. That said, it’s not everyone’s style. A cocktail wedding is a fun, modern alternative to the more formal seated alternative. There are many benefits of cocktail weddings: your guests can mingle more and the cost is generally lower.

Better advice?

“Make sure everyone is fed.” This means your guests, your vendors, and yourselves. There’s nothing worse than a wedding where canapes are scarce. Discuss this with your caterer and make sure you heed their advice when it comes to portions. It’s better to err on the side of caution no matter what style of catering you opt for.

“You need to invite this person—they won’t come, but it’s polite.”

Your guest list should be filled with your nearest and dearest. Banking on someone not turning up isn’t a risk you should be taking for your wedding day. That said, depending on who is footing the bill for your celebration, you might need to have some wriggle room for the guest list.

Better advice?

“Are mum and/or dad contributing financially to your wedding? Have an upfront conversation about their input.” It’s better to begin the planning journey with clear expectations. If you’re paying for the wedding out of your own pocket, as many modern couples do, it follows that you have the final say on who receives an invite.