Want some expert tips and tricks on how to manage and ease your pre-wedding butterflies? We’ve compiled a list of our favourite techniques for minimising those sneaky wedding day nerves and arming you with confidence and peace of mind.
Nerves are a natural response to big events in our lives, especially the exciting kind! It’s sometimes easy to confuse excitement with anxiety. While a few nerves here and there can be easy to manage, there are several tips and tricks to help ease those more stubborn feelings of fluster and bellies full of butterflies.
Here are some expert tips for dealing with those pesky wedding day nerves:
Plan out the essentials
Planning out your wedding seems like a no-brainer, but doing so in an organised, structured manner may help you feel a little more at ease as the big day approaches. While the process of choosing suppliers and organising your family to fly down for the wedding can cause a few headaches along the way, having these things pre-planned and organised will pay off in the end.
You may be a spreadsheet, sticky note, and big wedding binder type of person, or you may prefer outsourcing these tasks to a professional wedding planner. Whichever you choose, knowing that the basics of your wedding day are locked in can help reduce an immense amount of last-minute stress and running around.
Practising your vows ahead of time can also contribute to comfortable and confident delivery on the day. Byron Bay’s The Joyful Celebrant suggests “practising with a voice recording app to hear yourself.” This will help you understand where you need to slow down a bit, where to pause to take breaths, and allow your vows to flow more naturally on the day.
Talk to your loved ones
Talking to your loved ones about your expectations for the wedding day will help ease not only your nerves but theirs as well. You’re all in this together, and as soon as they know what you’d like them to do before, during, and after the wedding, the faster they can support you.
Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and open about how they can best lend a hand and offer support. While some people may think they’re helping, their actions may actually be causing you more stress than intended. We suggest gently opening up the discussion about what you need from them to ensure all parties feel comfortable and excited rather than anxious and confused about their role.
Spend quality alone time with your partner
Spending quality time with your partner before the wedding day is a beautiful way to relax those stomach flutters. Plan a cute date — watch a film together, have a picnic, go for a hike, or see a live band perform. Doing something totally un-wedding-related is a great way to take your mind off checklists and to-do’s and remember why you’re planning a wedding in the first place — because you love the person beside you.
Indulge in self-care practices
Ensuring your mind and body are well looked after is a key component to reducing any unwanted or unwarranted stress. As Perth’s Ceremonies by Rosemarie suggests:
“Indulge in a massage. Perhaps even relaxing drinks with some close friends.”
From rejuvenating baths and quiet reading times to walks in nature, there are plenty of ways to look after yourself and allow your mind and body to release some of that tension. Try focussing your energy on setting up a healthy routine for your soul weeks or even months before the wedding. Arming yourself with a few stress-relieving techniques will be much easier if you already implement them in your everyday life. You deserve some “me time” away from your phone and your spreadsheets.
Make a wedding self-care kit
Creating a self-care kit is a great way to ensure you don’t panic if you need a bandaid, some extra tissues, or a water bottle. It’s also a fantastic spot to keep any other nerve-reducing items, such as essential oils. Treat it like a security blanket on your wedding day.
Focus on getting a good night’s sleep
We all know sleep is an important and effective way to minimise anxiety. Sometimes even the strongest cups of coffee can’t save us if we haven’t gotten enough Zz’s the night before. Ensuring you’re well-rested for your wedding day may not be easy, with all the excitement buzzing around, but slowing down the night before may help you sink into the deep sleep you need. Try making yourself a nice cup of hot chocolate, taking a bath, and relaxing your muscles before bed.
Fuel your body
While you may not feel hungry the morning of your wedding day, it’s wise to eat something, no matter how small. Feeling nervous or excited can use up a lot of energy, so having something in your stomach can help balance it out.
Move your body
Though you probably won’t have time on your wedding day to run a marathon, experts often recommend exercise to reduce anxiety and release any nervous energy. A short walk the morning of, a nice swim the day before, or even a quick treadmill session may give you the relief your body needs.
Have an engagement photoshoot
Whether you’re a natural in front of the camera or a tad lens-shy, it’s normal to feel a little out-of-place or awkward on your wedding day when a camera is pointed at you. Southern Highland’s Nica Photography recommends asking your photographer for an engagement shoot.
“You’ll get to know your photographer and start to feel more comfortable with each other.”
Feeling safe, heard, and relaxed around your photographer is a fantastic way to ensure your nerves are minimal on the actual day.
Have a wedding rehearsal
Similar to booking a pre-wedding photography session, having a wedding rehearsal — whether ceremony or reception-only — will help you feel familiar and comfortable with the process and structure of your wedding. Fear of the unknown greatly contributes to pre-wedding nerves, so filling in some of those blanks can help.
According to Susan Robson of Jacaranda Ceremonies, a pre-wedding ceremony rehearsal with your celebrant is a great way to make you feel more at ease before the big day.
“One of the significant calming features is when you do your rehearsal with your celebrant. This gives you the opportunity to walk through the elements of part of your big day and know that you can be in that space on your wedding day, and all will be ok.”
Trust in your wedding party, celebrant, and coordinator
While there may be a million tiny details and questions needing attention on your wedding day, remember you aren’t alone in resolving them. You have a whole team to support you and take away any unnecessary stress. If one of your suppliers has a question, feel comfortable enough to direct them to your wedding coordinator, celebrant, or maid of honour.
Do breathing exercises
Focusing on your breath before and during your wedding can significantly reduce nervous energy and allow you to reconnect with your body. Hobart marriage celebrant Sarah Parker suggests practising a good breathing exercise that doesn’t take too long to perform. She recommends the 4-2-6 technique, which involves breathing in for four seconds, holding for two, and exhaling for six. This is suggested to slow down your heart rate and calm tension.
Consider having a first look
Doing a ‘first look’ before the ceremony is a great way to spend a few quiet moments with your significant other and ease your wedding day nerves before exchanging vows. You’ll also be able to capture your couple shots and group photos earlier in the day, saving time after the ceremony to enjoy cocktail hour with your guests. If you’d prefer to stick to tradition and see your partner for the first time as you walk down the aisle, that’s completely fine also — it’s your day, so you do you!
Find joy and humour in the unexpected
Many couples recommend expecting the unexpected on your wedding day. Weddings going perfectly to plan isn’t a common scenario. Sometimes your great aunt will sneeze right in the middle of your vows, or your florals won’t look exactly as they did in the photos. Finding the humour in these situations is a great way to keep your cool. They also make for funny anecdotes in the future.
Focus on your partner, the moment, and what comes after
Even though you may be getting ready in different houses and won’t see each other until you’re walking down the aisle, knowing your partner’s focus is on you and your future together will help you stay in the moment. Remember the most important thing — your wedding day is about your commitment to each other and the future you want to create. As the Sunshine Coast’s Hayley Hart Celebrant says:
“Just try to remember that regardless of all the little inconveniences, at the end of the day, you are marrying your forever lover, and you get to spend the rest of your life together. Sometimes this can be forgotten through all the smaller details.”
Wedding day nerves are a completely natural response to such an exciting, meaningful celebration. Don’t forget to validate your feelings while also implementing a few stress-reducing techniques to take the edge off.
If you need a hand with wedding planning, our lovely supplier specialists are here to make sure your day is a seamless and stress-free event. Chat with them today to get the ball rolling on your perfect day.
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