The Great Wedding Party Resignation: Why more of your friends are saying, “No, thanks!”

Once upon a time, being a bridesmaid was simple: you rocked a matching dress and maybe joined the hens’ night at the local RSL. Fast forward to today, and being in the bridal party often means interstate bachelorette trips, wedding weekends in the countryside, professional makeup, and pricey outfits. With the time and financial commitments piling up, it’s no surprise that many friends are now turning down the role altogether.

Why are more bridesmaids and groomsmen declining the role?

More and more bridesmaids and groomsmen are saying “no” to being in the bridal party, and it’s not hard to see why. What used to be a simple role has turned into a major time commitment, with bridal showers, bachelorette weekends, rehearsals, and the big day itself. Juggling busy work schedules and personal lives makes it harder for people to carve out the time, especially when some weddings now feel like multi-day events.

On top of that, the rising cost of living has made it difficult for many to justify the expense. From travel and accommodation to professional hair and makeup, not to mention the cost of the outfit and pre-wedding events, being part of a bridal party isn’t cheap. With the increasing expectations placed on bridesmaids and groomsmen, it’s no surprise that many are opting out to save their time, energy, and wallets.

We asked real people their thoughts on this trend.

• Pricey hens events. “The last time I was a bridesmaid, there was an expensive trip for the hens that I spent $400 on and needed to take time off work for.”
• One-wear outfits. “I have so many bridesmaid dresses that I’ll never wear again. I’ve started selling them online.”
• Unexpected costs. “I spent $500 on a green suit I don’t really like. All of the groomsmen also decided we should cover the cost of the groom’s suit as well because he was struggling with the cost of the wedding–I didn’t have the heart to tell them that I’m also on a tight budget!”
• Stressful MC duties. “I wouldn’t decline to be a groomsman for financial reasons. It’s an honour. I have declined to be the MC multiple times, though. That much responsibility makes the celebration feel like a job.”

So, what can you do about it?

Couples can make life a lot easier for their bridesmaids and groomsmen by being mindful of the growing time and financial commitments.

Let Them Choose Their Attire
Instead of dictating specific outfits, pick a colour palette and let your bridesmaids and groomsmen choose something they actually like. This way, they can find an outfit they’re comfortable in and might even wear again, saving them some cash in the process.

Limit DIY Duties
If you’re going the DIY route, try not to rope your bridal party into too much manual labour. Being there for you on the day and supporting you is already a big deal, so keep their tasks light.

Be Mindful of Scheduling
If you’re planning a wedding trip or hens/bucks weekend, try to schedule it so your wedding party doesn’t need to take too much time off work. A weekend away or aligning with public holidays can make it easier for everyone.

Skip the Extra Gifts
Let your bridesmaids and groomsmen know they don’t need to buy you a gift or contribute to the wishing well on top of covering their own expenses. They’ll appreciate the gesture and feel less pressure financially.

Keep Glam Optional
Professional hair, makeup, and nails? Make it optional. Give your bridal party the freedom to opt in or out depending on their budget and preferences.

Help Cover Hens/Bucks Costs
If budget allows, chip in for some of the basics at your hens or bucks weekend. Covering accommodation or an activity can make the trip more enjoyable without your friends worrying about the cost.

Hire a Professional MC
Instead of asking a mate to take on the pressure of being the MC, hire a professional. This allows your bridal party to relax and enjoy the day without juggling responsibilities.

Set Clear Expectations
Be upfront with your bridal party about what’s actually required from them. This way, they won’t be caught off guard by extra commitments or costs that pop up last minute.

Limit the Pre-Wedding Events
It’s tempting to pack in a bunch of pre-wedding events, but keep in mind that each one adds to your bridal party’s time and expenses. Stick to one or two key celebrations, and make sure they’re easy for everyone to attend.