Stan by Me Ceremonies
OVERVIEW
If you're on the hunt for an innovative marriage celebrant up for anything, you'll adore working with Jess Stanley of Stan By Me Ceremonies. Known for her warm, engaging personality and excellent communication skills, Jess will ensure everyone has a memorable and personable wedding experience. She has a natural way with words and will happily guide you with vow writing if required. Her ultimate goal is to authentically highlight the uniqueness and depth of your love story, and she is proud to share that couples often give her the feedback that their guests thought Jess was an old friend of theirs, because she spoke about the couple as if she had known them forever.
Since solemnising her first marriage in February of 2022, Jess has married over 150 couples—so you know you're in experienced, capable hands. From writing personalised love stories, sharing ceremonies with a couple's loved one, legals only dos, surprise weddings, commitment ceremonies, murder mystery weddings, beach weddings in the rain, incorporating children into ceremonies, stepping in at the last minute when celebrants had Covid...she's done it all, and she loves a challenge!
"Jessica was super friendly and professional… We felt super comfortable with her. She went the extra mile to check on my grammar too! We're so lucky to have her as our celebrant. She made us and our guests feel at home during the ceremony." — Jasmine + Ivan.
What you'll love about working with Stan By Me Ceremonies for your Melbourne wedding:
Highlights of working with Stan By Me Ceremonies Melbourne:
"I can't recommend Jess enough. If you want a ceremony tailored to both you and your partner, then Stan by Me Ceremonies will deliver. Jess made our ceremony enjoyable, meaningful, and so much fun – the perfect start to our wedding. Jess was delightful the entire time and helped to make sure that our wedding day was tonnes of fun and as easy as possible." — Heidi + Tim.
About
Hi! I’m Jess Stanley: celebrant, writer, performer & MC. I became a celebrant because I love hearing peoples' stories, and crafting a beautiful, sincere, relaxed but upbeat ceremony that perfectly suits their personalities. I'm laidback, warm, a great listener, and love helping couples write their personal vows, too! FIVE FAST LIKES: Coffee, the colour green, trivia nights, trashy 90s thrillers, cats. FIVE FAST DISLIKES: Bad listeners, shepherd’s pie, beer, humidity & the smell of sunscreen.
Jess Stanley
Business Owner
Wedding Brochure
Stan by Me Ceremonies Brochure
View all of our features and complete package inclusions in our PDF wedding brochure.
View BrochurePackages
THE BIG DEAL - $1,300*
*Please note that an extra fee may apply if your venue and rehearsal is further than 25km from my base location.
As Pitbull once said, Give Me Everything (or did Usher say that part? Or both of them? I can’t remember. Take me back to 2011, stat). This is the standard wedding offering from me to you.
For this package, we will work together to make your wildest ceremony dreams come true. We’ll meet before the big day, possibly become best friends, I’ll write you a gorgeous bespoke ceremony, and we’ll incorporate any special rituals, poems, songs, themed costumes, etc. that you please.
For this price, you will receive:
Before The Day
Two face-to-face meetings.
This is so that we can do some official paperwork that’s required before the ceremony, as well as get to know each other a little. Or a lot. I won’t pry more than is necessary, but I also LOVE deep chats. I’ll also provide you with some handy leaflets that will help you to prepare for what’s to come.
As well as a face-to-face, you can catch me on my emails or phone whenever you need. We can also chat via Zoom to go over further details if preferred.
The face-to-face meetings will take place either at my home office in Highett, or an agreed upon café/bar somewhere in the Bayside area. If you have kiddos or travel restrictions, please let me know and we can arrange something that works for everyone.
I’ll send you some fun questionnaires that will help me to create your ceremony, OR we can sit down in person and I’ll quiz you, live, on the spot, if you’re not into the idea of sitting at your comp and typing out some long responses about your love life!
Once we’re all confirmed, I’ll send you a link to the *special* page on my website (it’s not that special, don’t get too excited) that has plenty more helpful info about the legal requirements, example personal vows and writing prompts, and TWO questionnaires. One is all about your ceremony details (eg. Will you be exchanging rings, what colour would you like me to wear, who are your chosen witnesses) and the other is for you both to fill in separately and will tell me all about your relationship (eg. What’s your first memory of your partner? How would you describe them in three words). These questionnaires will provide me with all the info I need to tailor your ceremony (and is hopefully fun for you to fill in, too!).
If you’d prefer that we sit down together in person and I ask you this stuff live - great! Let’s do that. This may be the right option for you if you want your responses to feel more “natural” or “off the cuff”, if you don’t feel confident in sitting down and writing your responses, or if you’re just a real face to face kinda person. Whatever works for you!
I’ll take care of the legal paperwork.
I’ll help you fill in the required forms, and do all of the sending and filing needed. I’ll explain everything to you along the way so that you know exactly what’s going on.
I’ll write you a bespoke ceremony script.
I love writing, so I’m more than happy to design a ceremony script that’s right for the two of you. Whether you want it straight to the point, mushier than The Notebook, or funnier than a Bo Burnham special, I’ll do my best to tailor to you (Bo-level hilarity not necessarily guaranteed).
I strongly recommend that you write your own vows for the ceremony, and I can offer any assistance with this if you ask.
Help with your personal vows.
As well as providing you with some example vows (a mix of some that were kindly shared by my lovely friends and written by me. I’ll never tell…) and writing prompts, I’ll take a look or two over your vows before the day to check them for length, content, grammar, spelling, appropriate balance of mushiness and comedy - whatever you want. This also ensures that I won’t steal your thunder and say anything in the ceremony that you want to say in your vows. I’ll also ensure that everything is printed off on the day, so you don’t have to worry about remembering a copy.
Rituals & Readings.
If you’d like to include any special rituals or readings on the day, I can help to point you in the right direction and make suggestions. This could include a handfasting, a sand ritual – whatever you like! This is absolutely not necessary, though, and you shouldn’t feel obliged to include a ritual if you don’t feel a strong pull towards it.
One rehearsal.
If you want me, I’ll be there. We can go through the ceremony, where to stand, the legal stuff that you’ll need to say. We can even rehearse eating the food if you like. This is also a great chance to sign the Declaration of No Legal Impediment if we haven’t already.
Relationship education.
As a celebrant, I am required to recommend that you get pre-marriage counselling – but don’t worry, it’s not required that you do it unless you want to! Pre-marriage counselling should be seen less as counselling for relaionships on the rocks and more as a lovely way to strengthen your bond and learn some tools for marriage. After our first meeting, I will email you or give you a physical copy of the required pamphlet, which is very imaginatively entitled Happily Ever Before and After.
On The Day
Tell me what to wear.
I’ll dress appropriately to complement your outfits. If there’s a theme, you’d best believe I’ll get on board.
Meet my PA system.
It’ll make sure all your guests can hear me, as well as the two of you and anyone else who may speak during the ceremony. My MiPro system can also be used to play music, so if you’d like me to help coordinate the playing of any music for your ceremony, please ask!
I’ll conduct the ceremony.
Duh. A typical ceremony runs for 20-30 minutes. If you’re particularly interested in making it as short or as long as possible, let’s discuss. I will ensure that I arrive at least 20 minutes before the ceremony is due to start.
I’ll bring copies of your personal vows.
Whatever I can do to make it easier for you two, the better. Send me your personal vows before the ceremony (even if it’s the night before!), and I’ll have them printed on a schmick looking liale piece of thick white paper in a big, legible font. I’ll pass them to you right before you need them and take them back off you after you’re done.
Commemorative marriage certificate.
I’ll provide you with a commemorative certificate and a copy of your personal vows.
After The Day
I’ll lodge your marriage with the government.
Within two business days of your ceremony, I’ll lodge all the necessary documents with the Births, Deaths and Marriages office (BDM). From there, it will take a couple of weeks for them to process it at their end, but once it’s been successfully submitted, I’ll let you know.
Please note that the marriage certificate that will be handed to you on the day of your wedding by your celebrant is not considered a ‘legal’ certificate, and is more of a memento certificate. If you wish for me to obtain a copy of your legal certificate on your behalf, I can request this at the same time as I lodge your marriage and it will be sent via express post to your address when it’s ready. The cost of this service is $64.40, and I will invoice you for this extra amount once the marriage has been lodged.
If you opt out of this but change your mind later, it’s an easy process to apply for it on your own. I can provide you with a link for this after the ceremony.
I’ll bug you with one last email.
A couple of weeks after your completed ceremony, you can expect to receive one last email from me which will let you know that your marriage has been lodged, and provide you with some links that will help you to change names and apply for your legal marriage certificate if you want it. I’ll also send through a quick post-ceremony survey so that you can leave me some helpful feedback if you feel so inclined. If you have any photos to share from the day, I’d love to see your wedding album!
M I DI P A C K A G E - $900
As Fergie once said, a little party never killed nobody.
Small, intimate ceremonies can still be beautiful and unforgettable. This package is for you if:
*Please note that travel fees may apply if your venue is further than 25km from my base location in Melbourne.
For this price, you will receive:
Before The Day
One face-to-face meeting (if needed for paperwork), and an additional Zoom meeting.
This is so that we can do some official paperwork that’s required before the ceremony, as well as get to know each other a little. If we live yonks apart from each other, we can sign the paperwork over Zoom instead. I’ll also provide you with some handy leaflets that will help you to prepare for what’s to come.
As well as a face-to-face, you can catch me on my emails or phone whenever you need.
The face-to-face meetings will take place either at my home office in Highett, or an agreed upon café/bar somewhere in the Bayside area. If you have kiddos or travel restrictions, please let me know and we can arrange something that works for everyone.
I’ll take care of the legal paperwork.
I’ll help you fill in the required forms, and do all of the sending and filing needed. I’ll explain everything to you along the way so that you know exactly what’s going on.
I’ll tailor your ceremony script to suit the two of you (if a Commitment Ceremony), and help to craft your ceremony if the duties will be shared with a loved one.
I’ll also ensure that everything is printed off on the day, so you don’t have to worry about remembering a copy.
Help with your personal vows.
As well as providing you with some example vows and writing prompts, I’ll take a look over your vows before the day to check them for length, content, grammar, spelling, appropriate balance of mushiness and comedy - whatever you want. This also ensures that I won’t steal your thunder and say anything in the ceremony that you want to say in your vows.
On The Day
Tell me what to wear.
I will wear something to complement your outfits accordingly, and bonus points for themes. I love a theme.
I’ll conduct the ceremony.
The ceremony will run for approximately 20 minutes.
I’ll bring copies of your personal vows.
Whatever I can do to make it easier for you two, the better. Send me your personal vows before the ceremony, and I’ll have them printed on a schmick looking little piece of thick white paper in a big, legible font.
Commemorative marriage certificate.
I’ll provide you with a commemorative marriage certificate for you to keep forevs.
After The Day
I’ll lodge your marriage with the government.
Within two business days of your ceremony, I’ll lodge all the necessary documents with the Births, Deaths and Marriages office (BDM). From there, it will take a couple of weeks for them to process it at their end, but once it’s been successfully submitted, I’ll let you know.
Please note that the marriage certificate that will be handed to you on the day of your wedding by your celebrant is not considered a ‘legal’ certificate, and is more of a memento certificate. If you wish for me to obtain a copy of your legal certificate on your behalf, I can request this at the same time as I lodge your marriage and it will be sent via express post to your address when it’s ready. The cost of this service is $64.40, and I will invoice you for this extra amount once the marriage has been lodged.
THE PURELY LEGALS - $650*
*Please note that an extra fee may apply if your venue is further than 25km from my base location.
As Eminem once said, let’s get down to business. A legals only ceremony can still be delightful and special.
This package is for you if you just want the legals only stuff, no bells and whistles, with a very small number of guests.
For this price, you will receive:
Before The Day
One face-to-face meeting.
This is so that we can do some official paperwork that’s required before the ceremony, as well as get to know each other a little, and figure out what you do and don’t want included in your short ceremony. I’ll also provide you with some handy leaflets that will help you to prepare for what’s to come. If you'd prefer to meet face-to-face, please let me know and we can make it happen.
You can also catch me on my emails or phone whenever you need.
I’ll take care of the legal paperwork.
I’ll help you fill in the required forms, and do all of the sending and filing needed. I’ll explain everything to you along the way so that you know exactly what’s going on.
I’ll write a simple but lovely ceremony script that suits you as a couple.
This will be a short and sweet ceremony as we’ll just be doing the legal stuff, but I’ll still make it enjoyable for everyone involved.
I also strongly recommend that you write your own vows for the ceremony if this is up your alley, and I can offer any assistance with this if you ask.
On The Day
I’ll conduct the ceremony.
For a legals only wedding, the ceremony will be on the shorter side - typically 10-15 minutes.
Commemorative marriage certificate.
You’ll keep your commemorative marriage certificate that we’ll sign during the ceremony. It’s a pretty one!
After The Day
I’ll lodge your marriage with the government.
Within two business days of your ceremony, I’ll lodge all the necessary documents with the Births, Deaths and Marriages office (BDM). From there, it will take a couple of weeks for them to process it at their end, but once it’s been successfully submitted, I’ll let you know.
Please note that the marriage certificate that will be handed to you on the day of your wedding by your celebrant is not considered a ‘legal’ certificate, and is more of a memento certificate. If you wish for me to obtain a copy of your legal certificate on your behalf, I can request this at the same time as I lodge your marriage and it will be sent via express post to your address when it’s ready. The cost of this service is $64.40, and I will invoice you for this extra amount once the marriage has been lodged.
Videos
Location
Service Area Melbourne
FAQ
I’m warm, open and friendly, and I’m an excellent listener. I’m creative and grounded, with just a touch of quirkiness. I’m organised and tidy, but also a little bit of a prankster. I’m not the loudest person in the room or the quietest, and I’m always described as having a calming presence.
As a celebrant, I get that the day isn’t about me. It’s about the two of you and the commitment you’re making. When I solemnise a marriage, I ensure that the ceremony is focussed on you and your relationship, and try to let the humour come out through the stories about the two of you, rather than me trying to be a stand-up comedian and get laughs for the sake of laughs. In other words, I’ll be there to spotlight the two of you, not myself. I’d say that my ceremonies are a chilled out mix of cheeky, romantic and sincere. I won’t bore your guests with endless droning and I won’t nervously rush through the moment, either.
I also force ask my couples to fill in a post-ceremony questionnaire, and here are the most commonly used words that come back to describe me:
A few different ways! Generally, we’ll start with a FaceTime or Zoom to say a quick hello and have an initial chat, and from there, if you think we’ll be a good fit, we can meet up in person for a coffee/wine and get to know each other a little more. I get to know my couples through a mix of chatting to you and asking you questions in person (I’m happy to listen to as much as you want to tell me about yourselves), and also sending through a couple of questionnaires for you both to fill out in your own time at home - one of these is full of questions about your ceremony (eg. where do you want me to stand, do you intend to include a reading, are you exchanging rings, etc.) and the second is for you to answer questions about each other and your relationship, what marriage means to you, and all that jazz. Some couples are much more private than others, so I’ll take your lead on all of this to make sure that you’re only sharing with me what you’re comfortable with, and only what you want included in your ceremony. We’ll generally meet up at least one more time before your big day, to go over the ceremony details more thoroughly and have a general check in, plus, if you plan to have a rehearsal, I’ll do my best to make it to that as well.
I’m an actor and writer, and I have a background in psychology. I believe my skills as a performer will help make your ceremony engaging and entertaining, while my skills as a writer will ensure a solid ceremony script, as well as help in writing your vows if you need. As a psychology enthusiast (I also have mental health first aid training), I believe that I’m a pretty good judge of character, and aside from bringing my great listening skills, I’ll be able to get a good grasp on who you both are as individuals and a couple, which I can incorporate into the creation of your ceremony. I’ve also been told that I’m a very calm and composed person, and that seems like the right kind of energy that you want near you on your wedding day.
My registration came through in 2021, and I haven’t looked back. By the end of 2022, my first year working as a celebrant, I had solemnised more than 50 marriages and quit my day job to solely pursue the jobs that I love full-time.
Absolutely! I strongly recommend that you write your own vows (this is the best part of the ceremony!), but I’m more than happy to give you suggestions of things to include in them in you’re unsure, or to read over them when you’re done and offer any thoughts. You can even practise them out loud on me if you like! If you’re really hesitant in writing them yourself, I can give you some prompts or loose structures that you can personalise.
Nope! You don’t have to feed me, and I promise I won’t pester your guests either. Generally, I’ll pack up my gear after the ceremony, and if people want to chat to me I’ll stay for about the time of one glass of sparkling, then head off—ideally, not without grabbing a photo of the three of us first!
(That said, occasionally a couple has very kindly invited me to stay for the entire wedding, and if the vibe is right, I'll do my best to!).
HELL to the YES.
Bit of yes, bit of no. All of the legal components of the ceremony must be performed by the celebrant, and it must be clear to everyone present that the celebrant is the prescribed authority who is legally authorised to solemnise your marriage. However, if you want a loved one to read out your introduction and talk about the two of you, perform a reading, or play a large role in the ceremony, there are certainly ways of incorporating them into it and I’ve done it before! This is a good option for couples who feel that it’s a bit weird for a celebrant who barely knows them or their history to talk about them as if they’ve been around for the whole relationship and is really just a matter of personal preference.
Absolutely not (I’m also a Leo, but I promise that won’t affect the ceremony either)! This is YOUR day and I can’t wait to shower you both with attention.
Where my skills as an actor will come in handy, however, is that you’re guaranteed a celebrant with an appealing, powerful voice, plenty of empathy, a complete lack of stage fright, and someone who is used to commanding a roomful of people, so your guests won’t want to start snoozing. Not to mention, I love dress ups so I’ll jump on board any theme you throw at me.
April 2023
April 2023
April 2023
November 2024
November 2024
Expert Advice
As a wedding professional, Stan by Me Ceremonies offers expert advice to help couples plan their perfect day. Ask a question or read their expert advice.
Get Expert AdviceAdvice for having your dog in your ceremony
Would love some advice! We def want to include our dog in our wedding ceremony! We want him as the ring bearer. Are they are any things to avoid or prepare for in advance? Thanks!
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Stan by Me Ceremonies
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Ok, I will recommend the following business to anyone who will listen: check out Silly Wagz Bridal if you're based in Victoria or Tassie. I recently met the gorgeous Rachel at a wedding and have nothing but great things to say. Silly Wagz will pick your pup up prior to your wedding, give them a walk, a groom, dress them cute, and chaperone them through your wedding! They'll pose them for photos, ensure they don't jump on guests or disrupt the ceremony, and pass them over to you or your bridal party for an adorable walk down the aisle.
I think this is a great idea because most couples love the idea of having their pet at the ceremony, but don't want to burden a friend or family member with duty of care. That said, if your pup is pretty low maintenance and you've got a guest who is happy to do it, have them hold onto your pup down the back or off to the side of the ceremony space with a few treats up their sleeve. I've had couples completely pull off the dogs as ringbearer at their ceremony! Tie those rings securely around a separate ribbon to their collar, and when the time is right, call to them and have them run down the aisle! If they're a bit more shy, they can be escorted down the aisle by a guest. So cute, and your guests will love it.